335God Damn Religion
Sunnah & Suratun
…Muhammad’s Despicable Life
Allah’s Repulsive Words
4
Lunacy
He reached the setting place of the sun and found it setting in a muddy spring. And he found near it a people.
Quran 018.086
He found the sun setting in a muddy spring.
Among the most insane recitals attributed to the inane Rasuli was showcased in Al-Kahf | The Cave. It is there that we find the basis for the prediction of “The Great Terror” proceeding from the “sweeping swarm” of Gog and Magog.
Attempting to assess what would prompt the village idiot to not only say something as utterly ridiculous as what is recorded in the 18th Suratun, but to attribute it to a wannabe god as his prophet, requires a little investigation because this is a very high grade of stupid. And what we discover takes us back to KabaVille in Petra during the days leading up to the Pledge to Wage War Against All Mankind and the Migration of Shame. This is 620 CE, AH -2, the year the 68-year-old pervert jumped in bed with his best pal’s 6-year-old daughter.
Returning to the scene of the crime, we read…
Ishaq:130 & Tabari VI:101 “The nastiest thing I saw the Quraysh do to the Messenger occurred when their nobles assembled in the Hijr. They discussed Muhammad, saying, ‘We have never seen the kind of trouble we have endured from this fellow. He has derided our traditional values, declared our way of life foolish, abused and insulted our forefathers, reviled our religion, caused division among us, divided the community, and cursed our gods. We have endured a great deal from him.’
336While they were saying this, the Apostle walked up and kissed the Black Stone. Then he performed the circumambulation of the Ka’aba. As he did they said some injurious things about him. I could see from the Messenger’s face that he had heard them. When he passed a second time they made similar remarks. When he passed them the third time, the Prophet stopped and said, ‘Hear me, O Quraysh. By Him who holds Muhammad’s life in his hand, I will bring you slaughter.’”
And he did, murdering Arabs, Jews, then Christians.
Tabari VI:102 “They were gripped by what he had said. The word he used struck people so not one could move. It was as though everyone had a bird perched on his head. Even those who had been urging the severest measures against him, now spoke in a conciliatory way, using the politest expressions they could muster.
They said, ‘Depart Abu al-Qasim [Muhammad’s actual name]; for by Allah, you were never violent.’” At least he wasn’t before he became demon-possessed and envenomated by the Snake.
Should you be curious, in Arabic, abu means “slave to.” It is from the Hebrew ‘ebed | slave and its verbal root, ‘abad | to work for and serve. Qasim in Arabic means “One Who Disputes.” In Hebrew, from which Arabic was derived, qasim is transliterated qasem and speaks of “practicing divination and witchcraft in service to Ba’al | the Lord.” Is it any wonder that he changed his name and his god’s when he migrated from pagan religious recluse to ruthless terrorist and thief?
Tabari VI:102 “The Prophet left and the next day they gathered in the Hijr. I (Abdallah) was again present. ‘You were talking about the unpleasantness which you endured and the things Muhammad has done, but when he said something disagreeable you shrank from him.’” As a result, the doves were consumed by the hawk.
Ishaq:143 “When they heard the Quran they said in mockery, ‘Our hearts are veiled, we do not understand what he is saying. There is a load in our ears.’ Then Allah revealed, ‘And when you 337recite the Quran we put between you and those who do not believe a hidden veil. They turn in aversion.’ When in secret counsel, the mockers say, ‘They are following a man bewitched.’”
It was true.
Ishaq:155 “Umar became a Muslim, he being a strong, stubborn man whose protégés none dare attack. The prophet’s companions were so fortified by him and Hamza that they got the upper hand on the Quraysh. ‘We could not pray at the Ka’aba until Umar became a Muslim, and then he fought the Quraysh until we could pray there.’”
Ibn Ishaq, Muhammad’s lone biographer, went to great lengths to explain Umar’s conversion…
Ishaq:156 “Umar said, ‘I am making my way to Muhammad, the apostate who has split up the Quraysh and made a mockery of our traditions, to kill him.’ ‘Your sister, Fatima, has become a Muslim so you had better go and deal with her first.’ Umar heard her reciting Khabbab [There is no surah by that name and it isn’t referenced in the text.] as he came near the house.
He said, ‘What is this balderdash?’ ‘You have heard nothing,’ she lied. ‘By Allah, I have,’ Umar said, striking his sister in the face and wounding her. When he saw the blood, he felt sorry and asked to hear what Fatima was reciting. ‘You are unclean in your polytheism and only the clean may listen to it.’”
Only in Islam.
Now leaving the Sira for the Tarikh, we discover: Tabari VI:106 “The revelation from Allah was coming to the Prophet continuously, commanding and threatening those who showed open hostility to him, and vindicating him against those who opposed him.”
At this point, Ibn Ishaq reveals a rather stunning admission. Rather than lash out at Muhammad, the family and friends thought they would be more successful in tempting him instead. I have entitled their proposal for peace “The Idolatrous Indulgence.”
338Ishaq:132-3 “Utba, who was a chief, said while sitting in a Quraysh assembly, ‘Why don’t I go to Muhammad and make some proposals to him? If he accepts, we will give him whatever he wants, and he will leave us in peace.’
They thought it was a good idea, because if they tried to negotiate with him they would no longer be blamed for his actions. So Utba went to the Prophet, who was sitting in the mosque by himself, and said, ‘O my nephew, you are one of us yet you have come to our people with a matter that is dividing the community.
You are ridiculing our customs. You have insulted our gods and our religion. You have even declared that our forefathers were infidels. So listen to me and I will make some suggestions, and perhaps you will be able to accept one of them.’ The Apostle agreed.
Utba said, ‘If what you want is money, we will gather for you some of our property so that you may be the richest man in town. If you want honor, we will make you a chief so that no one can decide anything apart from you. If you want sovereignty, we will make you king. And if this demonic spirit which has possession of you is such that you cannot get rid of him, we will find a physician for you, and exhaust our means trying to cure you. For often a demonic spirit gets possession of a man, but he can be rid of it.’
The apostle listened patiently.”
The Sira | Biography of Muhammad is as incriminating as the Quran. Muhammad’s extended family, those who knew him and his recitals best, far better than anyone today, realized that their relative was demon-possessed. And as a result, he craved power, possessions, control, and acclaim.
As it would transpire, the Quraysh had been a good judge of character. They knew what this was all about and understood the motivation behind Muhammad’s madness.
Muhammad did not argue with him. He made no attempt to deny that these were the things he sought or that he had been demon-possessed. It was obvious to everyone.
Ishaq:134 “‘Muhammad if you don’t accept our offer then ask your Lord to give us the land and water we lack, for we are shut in 339by these mountains, we have no river, and none live a harder life than we do.”
Utba just confirmed that they were in Petra with a defunct aqueduct, enclosed by mountains on all sides – and, therefore, not in Mecca. But by saying this, Utba destroyed one of Muhammad’s justifications for preaching Islam. The Quraysh weren’t as gluttonous as the Quran and Hadith claim. They were poor, barely eking out a living in post-earthquake Petra, just trying to survive.
Next, Utba turned the tables on his tormentor…
Ishaq:134 “If you speak the truth, resurrect Qusayy for us for he was a true shaikh, so that we may ask him whether what you say is accurate.” The Quraysh leader correctly identified the patriarch of Islam, the founder of the religion now memorialized in the Quran. The Arab who invented the scam Muhammad coveted was Qusayy.
Ishaq:134 “If you do this we will believe you and know that God has sent you as an apostle as you claim.’” Knowing that his god was impotent, Muhammad did nothing, so… Ishaq:134 “Well then at least ask your god to send an angel to confirm your depictions of paradise and give you the mansions and gold you obviously crave. If not that, then send us the Day of Doom you threaten us with, for we will not believe you until you perform a miracle.”
The Quraysh knew that a prophet devoid of prophecies was no miracle worker. What’s more, they knew that his god was as useless as all of the other rocks in their pile.
Ishaq:134 “Why doesn’t your god help you? Didn’t he know that we were going to present you with these opportunities to prove yourself? Listen, Muhammad; we know the truth. Information has reached us that you are taught by this fellow in Yemen called al-Rahman. By Allah, we will never believe in Ar-Rahman.”
Confronted by the unvarnished truth, that he was a fraud, having stolen the peculiar style and substance of the initial Quran recitals from Arab converts to Judaism among 340the Sabaeans in Yemen, I can picture this suicidal old man, this dimwitted and covetous psychopath, quivering in his sandals. His uncle had outed him by accurately stating the obvious. Then he said…
Ishaq:134 “‘Alright then, our conscience is clear.’ When they said this the Prophet got up and left.” The Quraysh saw right through Muhammad’s unprophetic act. They exposed him and laid him bare, just as I have done.
As you read these words, remember that Ishaq’s Hadith are not only considered to be divinely inspired, they represent Islam’s most essential and earliest writings. The Way of Allah’s Messenger provides the lone chronology of the non-prophet’s words and deeds written within three centuries of his life.
Ishaq:135 “‘Muhammad, your people have made certain propositions… They asked you for things so that they might know that your position with God is as you say it is so that they might believe and follow you, and yet you did nothing. They even asked you to hasten the punishment you are frightening them with, but you could not do it.’ The Prophet went to Khadija, sad and grieving.”
One of the most bizarre facets of this new game of “put up or shut up” involved some Jewish rabbis visiting from Yathrib. Noting Judaism’s influence on his stolen suratuns, the Quraysh had sent for them to test Muhammad’s claim that he was the last of the prophets. We’re told that the rabbis laid down a challenge.
Ishaq:136 “Ask him about the Mighty Traveler who reached the confines of both East and West. Ask him what the spirit is. And ask him what happened to the men who disappeared in ancient days. If he does not know he is a rogue, a forger, so treat him as you will.”
Whether or not rabbis posed such questions is hard to determine because, within a few years, Muhammad and his misfits killed them. So what’s germane is that the Quraysh 341convinced Muhammad that rabbis were gatekeepers when it came to validating prophetic credentials.
However, should the questions have been genuine, then the “mighty traveler who reached the confines of both east and west” would have been ‘Abraham and his wife, Sarah. They left the easternmost city known to the Jews, Ur, in Sumer, once Babylon and now Persia. And they traveled as far west as civilization was known to them – to Mitsraym – known as Egypt today. The Spirit is the Ruwach Qodesh. She is unique because She is feminine and represents the Maternal characteristics of Yahowah. Lastly, the men who disappeared long ago are Yisra’elites, becoming the lost tribes of Israel. Fourteen centuries before this question was posed, the Assyrians had attacked the Northern Kingdom and hauled God’s people away as slaves. These rabbis in Yathrib would have been their descendants. Anyone speaking for Yahowah would know these answers.
Ishaq:136 “So Muhammad said to the emissaries, ‘I will give you the answers tomorrow.’ But the Apostle waited for fifteen days without a revelation from God on the matter, nor did Gabriel come to him, so the people of Mecca began to spread evil reports.”
Muhammad’s relatives had fingered the Yemeni Hanif as the source of the non-prophet’s inspiration, so now the malcontent messenger couldn’t solicit those rabbis for assistance. He couldn’t rely on the Yathrib Jews either because he thought they had composed the challenge.
Left to his own devices, Muhammad retreated to the cave where he had initially been demon-possessed. He said that the answers finally came to him in the form of the 18th surah which was aptly named Al-Kahf | The Cave. The last time he was on his own searching for a god in all the wrong places, Satan had met him there.
This time, his spiritual adviser said that the “Mighty Traveler” was a space-traveling Muslim who was not only 342the first to visit the sun and counsel extraterrestrials, he filled the gap in the mountains bored by the mythical Gog and Magog. In all of the annals of Muslims assaulting profundity, this is their stellar achievement.
The answer the Lord of Lunacy provided to the rabbinically inspired Quraysh test seeking to validate the non-prophet’s credentials provides irrefutable proof that Muhammad and al-Lahi/ha/hu were clueless. Therefore, during this transition from the War of Words and Never-Ending Argument to the Idolatrous Indulgence and Satanic Statements leading to the Fabulous Fable of the flying Donk-Mule, and resulting in the Oath to Obliterate Humankind, it is important that we consider what was revealed to Muhammad in Al-Kahf | The Cave.
What the non-prophet and un-god revealed about Dhu’l-Qarnain | Possessor of Horns, whom Islamic “scholars” say was the resolutely pagan warrior, Alexander the Great, is stupefyingly hilarious. But before we jump into these murky waters, a word on Dhu’l-Qarnain | Possessor of Horns because the “answer” began with the un-god acknowledging that Muhammad had been asked about him specifically, in spite of the fact that this made-up moniker had not been mentioned in the rabbinical test.
In Arabic, the Dhu al prefix is thought to mean “the possessor of whatever characteristic follows,” in this case Qarnain. However, in our quest to be thorough, deuter is a Greek prefix for “next or second.” And most etymologists seeking to assess the identity of Dhu’l-Qarnain claim that the name means “Two Horned.”
Qarnain is the Arabic plural of the Hebrew qeren, which is simplistically translated as “horn,” but means so much more. Qeren speaks of “brilliant light emanating from the summit of the mountain.” It is first used in 1968 BCE (year 2000 Yah) when describing the ram Yahowah had provided to spare ‘Abraham’s beloved son, Yitschaq, 343on Mount Mowryah during the dress rehearsal for Pesach | Passover as the Beryth | Covenant Family was being confirmed. It is also used in conjunction with Dowd | David, the Messiah, Shepherd, and King who would deuter | return a second time to this same exact location to serve as the Pesach ‘Ayil | Passover Lamb in 33 CE (year 4000 Yah). He was not only the leading Ram, and as king would have worn a qeren | ram’s horn crown. Upon his deuter | next arrival, he will return to the qeren | summit of this mountain as qeren | brilliant and illuminating as the sun.
Therefore, while Muslims would have us believe that “Allah” made this name up to claim Alexander the Great was a Muslim, considering Satan’s animosity toward Dowd, his desire to corrupt and control him, turning God’s beloved son into a Muslim slave, along with Halal ben Shachar’s affinity for all things Qeren, I would suggest a different identity for Dhu’l-Qarnain – not that it matters since the object is to expose and condemn the Quran’s lunacy. Regarding this, a footnote in the Ahmed Ali translation of Quran 018.083 reads: “Qur’an commentators identify Dhu’l-Qarnain with Alexander the Great of Macedonia as he is the closest in his travels, wisdom, and Islamic prophethood to the description.”
So let the journey begin…
Quran 018.083 And they ask you about Dhu’l-Qarnain | Possessor Two Horns. Say, ‘I will follow and pursue, reciting to you who from him remember.’
As I have mentioned, since this is not what was asked, we must assume that this individual – this Great Traveler (through space and time) is the person the Rabbi | Lord Rahman | the Merciful wanted to corrupt for his purposes. And at this juncture between the War of Words leading directly to the Idolatrous Indulgence and Satanic Statements regarding the identity and quantity of gods in Islam, we have but three options. 1) There was no such person and so, like the rest of the Quran, this is yet another 344insane hallucination. 2) The wannabe god of the Quran thought it would be fun to pretend that the best-known and most accomplished pagan warrior of all time, Alexander the Great, was a Muslim astronaut and engineer. Or 3) this Snake, who long ago slithered out of the Garden and into the Desert in his quest to be worshiped as God, thought it amusing to turn his primary adversary for supremacy, King Dowd, into his devotee.
Buttressing my case, the voice of the Quran actually answered the third question first. Addressing “what happened to the men who disappeared in ancient days,” he said they were Moses and his servant who went sailing looking for a fish and some buried treasure. That inane story unfolds in the 60th verse of the 18th surah and continues until the Islamic god sends Dhu’l-Qarnain off looking for the extraterrestrials around the setting sun in the 83rd stanza. And we’ll return to this portion of the Quran in a moment because what better for the Adversary than after turning Moseh into a moronic Muslim, playing Dowd for a fool? After all, Satan was obsessed with corrupting all things Yahowah such that he could be perceived as Al-Lahu Akbar | Allah is Greater. Snakes may be serpentine and prone to changing their skin, but they are not particularly inventive. Albeit this one was clever…
Quran 018.084 Lo! Verily, we, we gave him in the ground and we gave him of heirs things and affairs a means and occasion. Quran 018.085 So, he followed a means and path on occasion Quran 018.086 until he reached, arrive at, passing away and departing, disappearing and retiring, setting place the sun.
He found it passing away and retiring, setting and disappearing a black and rotten, muddy, smelly, and angry, smiting and evil eye, a hole or spring.
And he found deviating and rebellious near it an encampment of a community (people) standing still. We said, ‘O Dhu’l-Qarain, either that you punish or that you take in them treat them in pleasing.’
345See, we can learn stuff by reading the Quran. Prior to this, no one knew that anyone had visited the sun or found that it retired each night by disappearing in a dark, rotting and muddy, stinky, and angry evil eye of hole. And it was heretofore unknown to we mere humans that there were rebellious deviants residing nearby. This is also the first time that we have heard of the Islamic god being nonchalant, not caring if the extraterrestrials were tormented or pleasured.
So, should you have read through al-Lahi/ha/hu’s initial banter regarding the sun’s bedtime story expecting to pass it off as another word salad, may I suggest reconsidering what he just stated? Whether I’m correct in saying that Satan’s objective was to corrupt Dowd’s life and legacy as Dhu’l-Qarnain, or whether he was a miscast Alexander the Great, there may have been a method to this madness.
The last time we were led down this path of ergot-fueled delirium, the Rabbi al-Lahi/hu/ha transformed Dowd into a Muslim commanding a bird-brained army led by the AWOL Hoopoe bird in the talking Ant surah. This led to the assault on the Bug Kingdom, which was on the verge of being smashed until Hoopoe reappeared and began bragging about the Queen of Sheba, and her grand throne. Then, Islamic Solomon started courting her as only a Muslim could. He offered to bribe her while threatening to kill her. Not unlike Muslim women, the queen was so dazzled by this approach that the story culminated in dancing across the glass floor of a palace and the embarrassment of immodestly showing ankle. Therefore, the 18th and 27th surahs, the Cave and the Ant, are related. By corrupting Jewish folklore, Satan was able to ridicule his adversary, Dowd, and his son, Shalomoh, while playing Muslims for fools. It was a productive day for the Snake.
As is the Lord’s custom, he must be seen in control of everything, so he is to be credited with establishing this 346fable. So, therefore, the Devil is accepting credit for Dowd’s great success. This would make the Mizmowr he wrote, the Beryth he exemplified, the Miqra’ey he fulfilled, and the Derek he followed, leading to his return as ha Mashyach and Melek, Satan’s doing – suggesting that King Sha’uwl | Saul wasn’t the only one in his era who was demon-possessed. As a result, should the Rabbi be correct, the Derek | Way now leads to ha Satan and not Yahowah. Or not.
Following the prescribed path led to the “setting sun,” which just so happens to be the opposite of Halal ben Shachar | the Arrogant and Brilliant Prodigy of the Rising Sun. Therefore, Allah was sending Dowd (or Alexander the Great) to a “murky and dark” place where the sun would set and, thus, be diminished. This is indicative of Satan because in the 89th Mizmowr, upon his return, Yahowah says that His Son “will be as God, as brilliant as the sun.” On that day, Yowm Kipurym in 2033 (year 6000 Yah), the people gathered around Dowd will be the remnant of reconciled souls comprising Yisra’el who, as a result of what we have collaboratively shared in Yada Yahowah, will enter eternity as heirs to the Beryth | Covenant.
This Family reunion, and the realization that it will be well attended by Yisra’el, will be lights out for Allah. So, since it will now be too late for him to do anything about it, the Lord is equivocating and, for the first time in the Quran, prevaricating because this is the moment he loses his ability to beguile humankind. The Adversary’s only hope is to have corrupted the greatest man who ever lived such that he shirks his responsibility and foregoes his commitment to return with Yahowah to reconcile the relationship with His people. Therefore, in Allah’s version of the story, Dhu’l-Qarnain punishes the aliens before dispatching them to Hell’s Warden who is already positioned in She’owl ready to inflict a terrible torment.
347Either that, or you can believe Alexander was an astronaut and that the sun goes to bed each night in a muddy hole projecting a stink-eye. There are actually extraterrestrials residing nearby, and they have been punished or appeased by a dead Macedonian. Either way, the Rabbi and his accomplice are sadists...
Quran 018.087 He said, ‘As for who lords over and oppresses, subjugating as a cruel tyrant, then soon we shall castigate and torture him.
Then he will be sent back and returned to his Rabbi, and he will punish him with a repugnant torment.
Quran 018.088 But as for who believes and does right, then for him a proper compensation. And we will speak to him from our command obtained with ease.’
I am compelled to remind you that we are reading the Quran, not a children’s fairytale – or more accurately, tormenting nightmare. Allah’s slaves believe that this is the perfect and final word of God rather than the dreams of a hallucinating schizophrenic.
And speaking of him, in an adjoining Hadith, Muhammad explained that the “people” who lived near the sun’s muddy-spring-setting-place were extraterrestrials: Tabari I:236 “Allah created two cities out in space… Were those people not so many and noisy, all the inhabitants of this world would hear the loud crash made by the sun falling when it rises and when it sets. Gabriel took me to them during my Night Journey from the Sacred Mosque [the Ka’aba] to the Farthest Mosque [the Temple which was no longer on Mount Moriah]. I told the people of these cities to worship Allah but they refused to listen to me.” I wonder if this proves that extraterrestrials are more advanced than humans?
The next stop on the Great Traveler’s journey through space and time followed along a path which would lead to the abode of the Rising Sun and to future Muslims. But at this time, that outcome has not been predetermined.
348Quran 018.089 He then followed a path Quran 018.090 until, when he reached ascending place the sun. And he found it rising on a community standing still (people) not we made for them from against it any shelter. Quran 018.091 Thus and verily we encompassed of what with him known. …said Professor Allah, proving the Quran wasn’t inspired by an intelligent being.
And alas, these poor folks were scorched each morning because al-Lahi/h/ha was too busy torturing infidels to provide a shelter from the sun. Nonetheless, the un-god would have Muslims believe, that of Two Horns and his solar adventures, “Thus and verily we encompassed of what with him known.” Behold, lo then, we speaketh the word good and smart two.
So, after telling the Quraysh and the handful of neophyte Muslims that he was up to the challenge and could pass this test even if standing still in an odorous hole with stink-eye, the un-god reveals he knew all about Dhu’l-Qarnain, the Mighty Traveler. The Serpent had returned to familiar territory – to befuddling the ignorant and inarticulate as he had once done through Ezekiel in Babylon. As confirmation of this, in Babel ~ Venomous, I methodically unravel the myths of Gog and Magog following the resurrection of the Army of Dry Bones, leading to the ultimate showdown for Satanic supremacy in Jerusalem circa ‘Abyb 1, 2030 – T minus 3 years to Dowd’s return. And, therein, I demonstrated that Ezekiel’s Lord was the same fellow now speaking in the Quran.
Since it wouldn’t be appropriate to replicate the two-volume analysis of Ezekiel in the midst of our final Quranic assessments, suffice it to say for now there was no Gog or Magog. Therefore, the inclusion of those names in this story is yet another nail in al-Lahi/ha/hu’s coffin – assuming they make long and skinny ones for snakes.
This brings us back to Islam’s poison pill, albeit more colorfully this time…
349Quran 018.092 Then he followed a path Quran 018.093 until, when he reached between the barrier mountains he found from besides them a community standing still not who almost learned or understood speaking.
Quran 018.094 They spoke, ‘O Dhul-Qarnain, lo, verily, Ya’juj wa Ma’juj | Gog and Magog evil, corrupted, invalid, and decomposed, mischief makers in the ground. So may we make for you an obscene and conspicuous contribution on that you make between us and between them a barrier akin to a mountain?’
Quran 018.095 He said, ‘What (wealth, authority and power) given me in it my Rabbi better. So help me to be strong and prevail, firm and resolute. I will make between you and between them a barrier.’
It is curious that those “not who almost learned or understood speaking” managed to communicate with a space-traveling Muslim orbiting the abode of the sun where it rests before rising, doing so to such an extent they convinced him to return to Earth and oppose Gog and Magog. And verily, were these unnamed illiterates the true prophets of Islam since they phrased and promoted the Idolatrous Indulgence (power, sex, and money) with their “may we make for you an obscene and conspicuous contribution” centuries in advance of the showdown in Petra? Even their assessment of their foes as “evil, corrupted, invalid, and decomposed, mischief makers” was a harbinger of the Never-Ending Argument and the impetus for mutilation in the 5th surah. So, verily, these were some farseeing aliens. And as future Muslims, they offered a bribe to boot.
In the previous surah, Gog was not to arrive until the Last Day, now they are making mischief in a time long past. Also interesting, the Suratun doesn’t describe these critters as people. If you recall, in Quran 021.092, “Gog and Magog are let loose and they swoop down, swarming,” akin to insects or demons. And that may be why these mischief makers are associated with Alexander’s off-planet extraterrestrial activities.
350Whether it is the Great Wall of China, Hadrian’s Wall, the famed French Maginot Line, the Border Wall with Mexico, or the wall fencing off Gaza, invaders always find a way around. Further, not only is there no evidence of such a barrier anywhere in the world (although I suppose no one has looked around the sun), but in ancient days, iron was too valuable to waste on barricades.
Quran 018.096 Give me zubara | ?~@& (well casings, sheets, sects, scripture, books, psalms) al-hadidi | ?~@& (the limit, oppose, sharp, punish, prohibit, iron) until when sawa | ?~@& (leveled, made uniform, established, ascended, directed, equal, fashioned) (the gap) between al-sadafayni | ?~@& (barrier, obstacle, obstruction, hindrance, restriction, cliffs, turn away) (two mountains).
He said blow until when he made it (red as) fire. He said ‘Give me uf’righ | ?~@& (I empty, vacate, cease, finish, attend, pour) over it qit’ran | ?~@& (drops and drips, heaps, tar, molten copper, great wealth, stored up, sides, regions).’
This is déjà vu all over again. When translating Ezekiel for the Babel series, I discovered that one word in 50 was contrived and could only be defined by context and guessing. Such is the case here, with zubara being the most sour note among a string of odd choices. You may recall that it served as a crude transliteration of mizmowr to address Dowd’s Psalms. But since that connotation isn’t permissible here, Allah’s little helpers interjected “sheets,” fully aware that there was no justification for that rendering.
If translating al-hadidi, the Suratun would have read, “the defined limit.” Elsewhere in the Quran, in addition to “limits,” it is presented as “oppose and sharp,” while it is further defined as “punish and prohibit.” Should al-Lahi/hu/ha have wanted to say “iron,” he would have used “barzel.”
While sawa means “to level and make uniform,” it is rendered as “established, ascended, directed, rose, turned, 351boarded, sit, even, equal, same, alike, equitable, straight, way, sound, midst, fashioned, proportioned, fashioned, restore, alike, and rested” elsewhere in the Quran.
Al-sadafayni is properly defined as a “barrier” in the sense of an “obstacle, obstruction, or hindrance which restricts” but these connotations make no sense following bayn | between in this context, so the meaning is simply changed to “the two mountains or cliffs.”
The sentence, “He said blow until when he made it fire,” confuses asking with causing while grossly exaggerating the effects of breathing – especially in space alongside the sun, since that is where Two Horned from the talkative speechless community. One would have thought that there might have been sufficient heat generated by the sun, even when emerging from the stinky hole. But Allah knows best.
At the same time, a thoughtful Muslim may want to ask their un-god to explain, “Give me uf’righ | I empty, vacate, cease, finish, attend, pour over it qit’ran | drops and drips, heaps of tar, molten copper and great wealth, stored up sides and regions,” since he is alleged to have said it. And while they are chatting, one may want to inquire about Satan’s fascination with molten metals since in Ezekiel, the Devil’s accomplice, whom I refer to as Measure Man and Bronze Boy, has the appearance of molten bronze or copper.
Quran 018.097 So not is’ta’u | they (Gog and Magog) obeyed, consented, or permitted (were able) to appear, apparent, open, visible, dominant, or back (scale or climb) it. And not is’ta’u | they obeyed, consented, or permitted (were able) in it pierce, bore, or explore (dig a hole through (the barrier)).
Quran 018.098 He (Dhul-Qarnain | Two Horned) said, ‘This Rahman | favor and benefit, womb of mercy from my Rabbi. But when comes promised threat my Rabbi, he will make it dakkaa | crushed, beaten, deflated, and crumbled as dust (level). And is promise my Rabbi | Lord and Master suitable.’
352To usher in his Day of Doom, al-Lahi/ha/hu will deflate and pulverize the “copper-clad iron barricade” and let the Gogians pass so that they can wage war against the Army of the Dry Bones. And in this way, the rogue books of the Bible and the Quran are brought together and wed in a prophetic potpourri of pomp and ceremony heralding Satan’s grand entrance onto the world stage. So it must be true.
At least “swarming” and “surging” both start with an “s” so this version has something in common with the 21st Suratun. But a descent from a high hill and surging waves represent entirely different approaches. But alas, that is the least of the Quranic headaches. In this next rant, Allah is Hell’s tour guide and master of ceremonies…
Quran 018.099 And we leave some of them that day (Gog and Magog) to surge like waves in a state of agitated commotion and confusion over gnats and mosquitoes bitten and molested (one another), and blown in the shape or form (the trumpet), and we will collect and gather them collecting and gathering.
Who would have thought to put “to surge like waves in a state of agitated commotion and confusion,” and “over gnats and mosquitoes bitten and molested,” together in a cogent statement? And to the bites and sights, the un-god cleverly added the sounds of “blown in the shape or form” while “we will collect and gather them collecting and gathering.”
So, we must ask, exactly who and what are Gog and Magog according to al-Lahi/ha/hu? While conversant, heat tolerant, non-air breathing and yet blowing, these critters who are stymied by a short wall, appear to otherwise be alien bugs with a bite. Oh my. So if you happen to see them swarm in, you’ll know that the end is near. And, you’ll want to have some bug spray handy.
While the incredible tale of Astronaut Alexander traveling to meet with extraterrestrials living around where the sun goes to bed each night and then others where it 353wakes up in the morning contained elements too insane for anything other than the Quran, the story wasn’t entirely novel. There was a Syriac fable circulating in northern Mesopotamia circa 620 CE, shortly after the Byzantine emperor Heraclius defeated the Persian Sasanians, which featured a revisionist Alexander doing battle during the apocalypse with Gog and Magog. As legend had it, the make-believe Alexander carved prophecies on the face of a Gate denoting the time the Huns, a consortium of 24 nations, would breach the Gate and subjugate the world. So it appears that the scribes in Persia who first compiled the Quran were keen on plagiarizing, too, so make of this what you will.
Although, considering the recommendation for bug retardant, it may be too late, because…
Quran 018.100 And we will prepare, place, and present, exposing and offering Hell that day to the reconciled (disbelievers), prepared, placed, and presented, exposed and offered.
Hell isn’t being presented and offered to the mischievous and snarling gnats or mosquitos, but for the kafir | reconciled. Satan doesn’t much like those Yahowah adores. It would appear that God and the Adversary have a conflict of interest. Who knew?
Quran 018.101 Those had been their eyes within a cover from my reminder and were not able hear, Quran 018.102 do then think those who are reconciled that they can take my slaves from besides me awliyaa | close friends, relationships, allies, or guardians turning away (protectors)? Verily, we have prepared and provided Jahannama | Hell nuzulan | an abode to come down to as a revealing gift for the entertainment for the kafir | reconciled (disbelievers).
It's a miracle because the blind will not be able to hear but they will see the Hell al-Lahi/ha/hu has exposed for their entertainment. But be forewarned, there will be no stealing slaves at this time, even if they are close friends of former guardians. The Lord’s gift must be enjoyed 354individually, even though the invitees were gathered and collected, gathered and collected.
Beyond the linguistic anomalies, Allah is continuing to have an identity crisis. He does not know if he is Rahman or al-Lahi, or even “we,” “we,” “we,” “my,” “my,” “me,” or “we.”
Nonetheless, the Rabbi’s story of misappropriated and misplaced adventurers winds down in typical fashion with a “him” sandwiched between a couple more instances of “we” followed by a “my,” a “my,” another “my,” and then a stilted declaration in third person as we conclude the Suratun.
Quran 018.103 Say, ‘Shall we come forth highly exalted to assault and inform you suffer loss, deceived, cheated, circumvented, and deviated (the greatest losers in respect of) doing (deeds)?
Quran 018.104 Those is [sic] lost, straying away, their walking and striving in the life the near and low (world) while they think that they good making. Quran 018.105 Those, the ones who kafar | are reconciled (disbelieve) in ayati | signs and proofs (verses) rabbihim | their Lord and the meeting thrown by him. So vain and worthless their doing. So not we standing up or still for them the day the standing up or still (resurrection), weight.
Allah’s days of being exalted and of assaulting will soon be over. Far too many have been deceived and cheated. Although, it is a wonder anyone believed this worthless discourse in the first place.
And should Muslims be sufficiently irrational to believe that they will be resurrected, spoiler alert: it is not possible nor desirable. Just as there have been no signs, there will be no meeting. And that’s good news since Allah always seems to be in Hell.
Quran 018.106 That shall be their payment, hell, because they reconciled and took my signs and proofs (verses) and my rusuli | messengers in contempt and derision, laughing, jesting, and mocking.
355Quran 018.107 Lo, verily, those who believed and did right, will be for them Jannatu | Gardens of Demons, al-fir’dawsi | prostrate before the adversary, violently spread on the ground (paradise) nuzulan | to descend and entertain. Quran 018.108 remaining forever in it. Not they will desire from it change or alteration.
With Yahowah, Yitschaq | Laughter led to the Covenant and eternal life in Heaven. In Islam, laughter leads to Hell. Although, considering the demons, prostrations, and violent episodes in Jannatu, it may not be any better.
And while that wasn’t funny, what follows is hilarious…
Quran 018.109 Say, ‘If were the sea something drawn or a supply of ink for commands and speaking rabbi | my Lord, surely, vanished and failed, exhausted and depleted the sea before that vanish, fail, cease and exhausted speaking my Rabbi, even if we brought like it as an erect mutilation and castration something drawn and extended ink.’
One might suppose that the un-god told his non-prophet to exaggerate, actually hallucinate, and say that, “if the sea were filled with ink, you’d still need another one to supply a sufficient quantity to write all he had to say in the Quran.” That is quite the claim since they had not yet used a drop of it. So from a credibility standpoint, this is akin to a Snake claiming to be God.
So, now that the al-Lahi/ha/hu has explained that his decision to leave the Quran as a verbal recital was predicated on environmental grounds, since he didn’t want to drain the seas of ink, we can move on to the next oral exchange, even though it appears unrelated to what preceded it…
Quran 018.110 Say, ‘only I an animal, a piece of meat, erect, mutilated and castrated like you. Has been indicated and revealed to me that your ilah | god one ilah | god. So whoever hopes meeting his Lord, let him do doing right and not a partner, companion, associate, or sharing in worship his Rabbi, any.’
356And thus concludes the Surah of the Cave with Muhammad being forced to acknowledge that he was but a basar | piece of meat mith’lukum | mutilated and castrated. Therefore, it must follow that “your ilah one ilah – a singular anti-social recluse without friends, companions, or partners who is unwilling to share. But why would a supposed god who does not want to be associated with anyone want to be worshiped?
While we were not told the fate of Two Horned, the speechless extraterrestrials, or the pesky swarm of Gogians, there was an additional Magog Hadith… Bukhari:V9B88N249 “One day Allah’s Apostle entered upon her in a state of fear and said, ‘None has the right to be worshipped but Allah! Woe to the Arabs from the Great evil that has approached (them). Today a hole has been opened in the dam [Alexander’s iron barrier between the mountains] of Gog and Magog like this.’ The Prophet made a circle with his index finger and thumb. Zainab added: I said, ‘O Allah’s Apostle! Shall we be destroyed though there will be righteous people among us?’ The Prophet said, ‘Yes, if the (number) of evil (persons) increases.’” Somebody had a wild imagination – one might even call it hallucinogenic. And of course, by claiming that the Magog swarm was underway, 1,413 years in advance of the Last Day, Muhammad further annulled his un-prophetic credentials.
So it is only reasonable to conclude that if a contest were held for the all-time dumbest duo, Muhammad and Allah would win hands down. And to think that they were pretending to be god and prophet, their incredulous audition has to be the most delusional in history.
There is more to the 18th Suratun worth considering. And for that, we must retreat to the beginning. If you recall, the rabbis posed three questions to Muhammad. He has just 357answered the first of them with the tale of Two Horns the Muslim astronaut and civil engineer. So, now it is time to provide proof that he was a prophet by explaining who disappeared in the second of the three queries.
Ishaq:136 “Ask him about the Mighty Traveler who reached the confines of both East and West. Ask him what the spirit is. And ask him what happened to the men who disappeared in ancient days. If he does not know he is a rogue, a forger, so treat him as you will.”
While we will ponder al-Lahi/hu/ha’s laughable retort first, rest assured, the un-god was lying through his fangs and up to his usual tricks. He pilfered what we are about to read in Quran 018.009-026 from a Christian fable. So, I will share the original story with you at the conclusion of our review.
Narcissists and psychopaths covet praise, but none more so than Satan while pretending to be God…
Quran 018.001 Praise to eulogize and commend the fiercely burning and vehement, il-Lahi, the one who brought down to his slave the writing and not made it crooked, distorted, ill-natured, insincere, or deviating.
So the despicable enslaver and human trafficker was a slave according to the Adversary in his quest to suppress freewill. Further, the illiterate duo claim to have “brought down a writing,” when it was so obvious that they were inept in this regard, their failure is actually acknowledged in the Quran. Then delusional as ever, the most distorted, insincere, and ill-natured rant ever recited isn’t actually deviant. So, evidently, someone doesn’t know what these words actually mean.
According to Islamic Tradition, Muhammad was a hunchback who was miserable and insufferable, so this cannot be true either…
Quran 018.002 Standing upright to vow, warn, and caution an evil and adversarial, miserable and insufferable, punishment, 358grievous and terrible while firmly bound and strapped min ladun’hu | from his presence. And give happy tidings the believers, those who do right that for them a good and pleasurable reward.
When the “warning” is that your wannabe god is a sadist, you may want to pick another. It wouldn’t have been difficult since they were strewn throughout the rock pile.
In this case, al-Lahi/ha/hu is calling his “adversarial punishment miserable and unbearable, indeed, excruciating.” His intent was for his tortures to be so terrible he would have to strap his victims down so that they would not be able to lash out or get away. And this would rank Allah among the worst of men.
And we are to believe that this is good news, happy tidings for the believers. The Lord of Terrible Tortures has a reward for them too – one he will no doubt find pleasurable. So loiter around here a little longer, dear Muslim and see what happens…
Quran 018.003 Loiter in it remaining and dwelling. Quran 018.004 And to warn, admonish, and put on guard those who say, ‘Al-Lahu has taken to beget (a son).
Yahowah’s intent in creating the universe, conceiving life, and authoring His Towrah was to enjoy being the Father of the Covenant Family. But by contrast, al-Lahi/hu/ha wants nothing to do with sons or daughters. Moreover, the chief rival in town was Jesus Christ and he was perceived by Christians to be the “Son of God.”
Digging himself in deeper, as is normal behavior for snakes, Satan claims that he knows more about the mythical misnomer of the world’s most popular religion than those who wrote the book about him…
Quran 018.005 Not they have for it from knowing. And not their fathers hard, grievous, grown up (arrogant or greater) the speaking comes out of their mouths. Not they say except a lie and fabrication.
359There are four glaring problems with Satan’s latest rant. First, Christians are the source of the story he is about to misappropriate. So to claim that they are liars means that by plagiarizing them, he is among the fabricators.
Second, the Christians had books, so unlike Muslims with their Suratuns, they weren’t mouthing all of this while giving lip service to Satan. Third, al-Lahi/hu/ha claims that he inspired the Gospels, and they state unequivocally that Jesus was the Son of God.
And fourth, while Christians are wrong about Jesus being the Son of God, Yahowah has a beloved Son – Dowd. To deny this is to pronounce God a liar.
Quran 018.006 Then perhaps you would the one who kills, enraged, subduing and abasing yourself over their narration of their footsteps if not they believe in this the new and recent narratives, sorrowful, grief stricken, and angry.
One can only suppose that Satan was enraged over the fulfillment of Passover and Matsah, so his advice to the potential beneficiaries was to go off and kill themselves. Islam’s un-god had a strong preference for death – perhaps because it is a fate that will elude him.
With one notable exception, this next statement (or two) falls under the category of those which are incomprehensible. That exception is the pronouncement that al-Lahi/ha/hu does not care about anyone or anything other than himself. As a psychopath, he has no empathy.
Quran 018.007 Lo, verily, we, we have made what on the ground adornment for it that we may test and try them without caring which of them best doer.
Quran 018.008 And lo, we verily make what on it cut off, destroyed, and exterminated, a laborious punishment which is severe, like running uphill.
When the Quran is reordered chronologically, the impression is that the Never-Ending Argument is its most 360repetitive rant – but that is not true. The single most repeated theme in the Quran, and by a wide margin, is Allah’s threat to torture people in a punitive manner. And even here in the 18th Suratun, the extermination of humankind leads to intense and ongoing punishments.
Since the idiocy found within The Cave was recited belatedly in response to the prophetic challenge, it is odd that the non-prophet answered them out of order. What follows is his answer to “those who disappeared in ancient days.” Who knows, Allah may have thought that there was some kind of connection between his punitive punishments and those inflicted by Rome, thereby explaining the transition from one story to another.
Quran 018.009 Or you suppose that companions al-kahfi | the cave and the writing, the inscription, were from our signs and proofs a wonder or marvel to impress, please, and astonish.
This is especially bold for the Snake. He’s claiming that by being able to cite aspects of a popular Christian religious fable to answer a test posed by rabbis he is proving that he is god – delivering signs and proofs. I find that astonishing. Islam’s un-god is claiming that by misappropriating a story written by Christians he is proving that he is the god of Islam. Using this logic, should you misquote the Talmud, you could be Shiva.
Quran 018.010 When took shelter the youths inquiring to al-kahfi | the cave and they said, ‘Rabbana, give us from yourself Rahman and make ready for us from our command directed.’
The story of The Seven Sleepers was world-renowned because it was well-written. But al-Lahi/hu/ha couldn’t even plagiarize it adroitly.
This story, sometimes referred to as the Seven Sleepers of Ephesus, was written centuries before the Quran. It is a legend, a parable of sorts, depicting young men hiding in a cave in 250 CE to escape Christian persecution under Decius which continued with Diocletian through 305 CE, 361formally concluding with the rise of Constantine in 306 CE. Once al-Lahi/ha/hu is finished Islamizing the tale he is plagiarizing, I’ll share more about its Christian origins.
Quran 018.011 So we struck over their ears in the cave years counting. Quran 018.012 Then we removed, rousing, and raising them up that we marked and knew which the befallen and distressed confederates, these factions and parties counted for what delayed time.
The Snake does not know why the characters in this story were shown retreating to the cave. He is unaware of the context of place and time – both of which were essential to the original plot. He does not even appreciate why the duration of time matters in this case. And to add insult to injury, he did not appreciate the fact that the youths in the story were unaffiliated with any political or militant group such that they could not be confederates or factions.
As I have said, any time Allah claims he is telling the truth, he is lying. And in this case, he is taking credit for another religion’s story – and still can’t get it right.
Quran 018.013 We narrate to you their exalted story in truth. Lo, they youths who believed in their Lord. And we increased guidance.
While the youths in the story of the Seven Sleepers believed in their Lord, their Lord was Iesou Christou, not al-Lahi/ha/hu. Therefore, had “we” “increased guidance” for them he would have been promoting Christianity.
Quran 018.014 And we tied, bound, and made firm, tethering on their hearts when they qamu | stood up and still. And said, ‘Our lord, the lord the high and lofty and the ground. Never we will seek, invoke, or ascribe from besides him a god. Verily, we would have said then far off, extravagant.’
Since the young men in this story were Christians being persecuted by Rome 400 years before the first Muslim, they could not have said any of the above.
362Quran 018.015 These qawm | our standing up and still (people) have taken from besides him gods. Why not they come to them prevailing and predominating between separating and severing (clear)? And who cruel lord and subjugating oppressor than who invents a lie?
As is his custom, al-Lahi/hu/ha must make everything appear as if it played out consistent with the Never-Ending Argument. So the Sleepers were criticizing their foes as if they were mini Muhammads. Between the Suratun and Sunnah, Allah has projected Muhammad on ‘Adam, Noach, ‘Abraham, Lowt, Moseh, Dowd, Shalomoh, and Jesus – so why not now with the undisclosed Sleepers who weren’t sleeping?
Quran 018.016 And when you set aside and remove from them and what the worship except al-Laha then took shelter to the cave will spread and resuscitate for you your Lord of his favors and womb of benefits and will prepare for you from your command easy.
The first written reference to an al-Lahi/hu/ha is a lone carving outside Petra, not only dating to the 7th century CE – four centuries after the events in this story played out, the name was found among many hundreds belonging to far more influential gods in Petra such as al-Lat, al-Uzza, and Manat. Therefore, recognizing that the Sleeper’s tale was committed to writing four centuries before al-Laha’s name was known, this bit of replacement theology isn’t possible.
The easy command and the rising and setting sun additions to this story were replicated in the account of Alexander the Astronaut – suggesting that Allah has a limited vocabulary and originality.
Quran 018.017 And you have seen the sun when it rose, inclined to visit, embellished in falsehood from their cave to the right side and when it passed away, retiring, as a loan cut from them to the left while they in the opening thereof. That from signs and proofs al-Lahi. Whoever al-Lahu guides, and he the guided, and who he 363lets go astray, then never you will find for him a friend, guardian, relationship, ally, or protector, to follow or direct.
Satan, in his quest to be worshiped as if he were a god, is compelled to write himself into every story – as if nothing could possibly happen without his knowledge and involvement. The omnipresent and omnipotent fraud is the ultimate micromanager. And that is to say, he was inept considering how poorly things have played out.
Part of Satan’s problem is that he works alone, does not like anyone, degrades everyone, and claims credit for himself. He has no leverage, which is not surprising for a lowly snake.
Quran 018.018 And you suspect them awake while they asleep. And we turned them to the right and to the left while their dog spreading his stretching to be fast and firm. If you had looked at them you have surely turned back from them fleeing in flight. And surely you would have been filled as a chief by them ru’ba | terrorized.
Even in the details, the un-god must make it all about him. He’s saying that the Sleepers were similarly freakish, fearsome, and terrorizing. But, come on, the boys were snoozing. Perhaps they were snoring while sawing logs, and while my wife tells me that it’s annoying, it’s hardly frightful or petrifying.
Quran 018.019 That we removed and roused them that they might ask among them. Said a voice among them, ‘How many have you delayed?’ They said, ‘We delayed and hesitated a day or gnats annoying and mosquitoes biting part a day.’
Apparently, al-Lahi/hu/ha was taking a long nap along with them in the cave because he’s, well, we’s, the one rousing them. But then he must have slithered away, because there was no one around to answer the “voice’s” question. And wasn’t it but a few verses ago that the Snake assured us that he increased the Sleepers’ knowledge, while now they don’t even know what day it is?
364One of Islam’s most cited phrases after “Allahu akbar” is “Allahu a’alam – Allah knows best.” The signature slogan serves to promote Allah above Yahowah while the second was designed to sidestep his inability to communicate credibly.
Quran 018.019 cont. They said, ‘Your Lord knows (best) what (how long) you have delayed. So remove one of you with leaves (a silver coin) of yours this to the city and let him see which is increased and purified tasting and swallowing and let him give to you provision from it and let him be delicate and subtle, slender and elegant (cautious). And not make knowing about you anyone.
Quran 018.020 Lo verily, they if they come to know about you they will stone you or return you to their religion. And soft and lenient, gentle and tender (never) will you slit, crack, or split (succeed) then staying (ever).
In the story of the Seven Sleepers, not only is the coin properly described, the image on it is relevant to the story – and so is the city, because Ephesus was the battleground in Christianity between the two most infamous players – John and Paul. Further, rather than being “stoned” for having been miraculously preserved over the centuries, the Sleepers were heralded as saints – or so goes the story.
Quran 018.021 That we made know about them that they might know that promise al-Lahi true and that the run free, be lost, and hour no doubt in it. When they draw forth, take away, and pluck out, while stripping off (disagree) among themselves about their command and authority (affair) and they said, ‘Construct over them a structure. Their Lord knows (best) about them.’
Said those who conquered, subdued, and were victors in the command (matter), ‘Lo, we will take over them a submissive place of prostration, obeisance, and worship.’
“Run, Forest, run!” or so another story is told through the eyes of the mentally impaired. We are to believe that the “promise al-Lahi true” and that you can “run free” and “be lost,” even that there is “no doubt” in the timing or assurance of “the Hour” because Islam’s wannabe god was 365a crappy plagiarist. But at least as a literary pirate, he was perfectly paired with his sand pirate.
But who was “drawing forth, taking away, plucking out, and stripping off? Who was issuing commands? Who conquered whom while sleeping? Who was subdued in their dreams? Why does al-Lahi/ha/hu tell a story so poorly, no one ever knows who is doing what to whom, when, where, or why?
Quran 018.022 They say, ‘Three, four of them their dog, stoning, cursing, reviling (guessing) absent, hidden, and concealed slander and backbiting (unseen).’ And they say, ‘Seven and eight of them their dog.’ Say, ‘Rabbi knows (best) their counting (number). None knows them except a few. So not argue about them except a dispute clear and obvious. And not be young or full grown, brave or generous, advising (inquiring) about them among them anyone.
This is like arguing over the number of fish in Dr. Suess’ One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish. Was “Two Fish” a second fish or two fishes, making five, not four swimmers? How long were they in the water? What was their religion? Who was their rabbi? Are you going to get contentious over the counting when “none knows but a few?” Were the fish generous, playing nicely with their friends and sharing their toys, making them infidels, or were there green-and-black fish lying in wait as brave jihadists out to slaughter the disbelievers?
This inane line of not questioning leads to not preparing for tomorrow. Since al-Lahi/hu/ha pictures himself pulling everyone’s strings, Muslims are to avoid prior planning – unless it is a plot to kill Jews then Allah is oft-forgiving, most merciful.
Quran 018.023 And not say of anything or matter, ‘Lo, I will do that tomorrow morning.’ Quran 018.024 Except if al-Lahu wills. And remember your Rabbi when you forget. And say, ‘Perhaps that my Rabbi will direct me to approach nearer (way) than this which is correct.’
366Yep, that is what he said: “Remember your Rabbi when you forget.” Who knows, al-Lahi may want to be al-Lahu tomorrow and abrogate Jihad in favor of offering Jews lollypops.
Next, al-Lahu, as I expected, chose this variation of his name and then, because he knows best, answered the question no one was asking. And even then, the all-knower who was admittedly absent from the heavens, as they were out of his reach, gave the wrong number – by a century, add nine...
Quran 018.025 And they remained in the cave three hundred years and add nine. Quran 018.026 Say, ‘Al-Lahu knows (best) about what they remained.’ Lahu | For him absent and concealed, out of reach, the heavens and the earth. How he sees of it and how he hears. Not for them for any wali | close friend to share, companion to associate, protector to guard, or anywhere to turn for help. And he does not share huk’mihi | his commands, wisdom, decisions, authority, or judgment (with) anyone.
So, the moral of the story of the seven friends who sought to avoid Roman persecution in the Christian fable is “No friends for you.” And alas, in the second-to-last Suratun we will be reviewing together, the un-god says that “he does not share his commands, wisdom, decisions, authority, or judgment (with) anyone.” So what was the purpose of the Quran?
It seems just a wee bit disingenuous and a whole lot delusional, for al-Lahu to claim he knows best what occurred in this story, such that nothing is concealed from him when he stole it from the religion he was denouncing in the first eight verses of this very Suratun. The entire affair, from beginning to end, at least apart from the inanest Islamic embellishments to make the Sleepers appear like mini Muhammads, was a Christian fable.
This Christian theological essay was extant in a variety of Syriac sources dating prior to the time of Gregory of 367Tours, circa 550 CE. While he didn’t write it, his insistence that the fable was true made it famous.
The second oldest copy of the story is found in MS Saint-Petersburg 4 which dates to 450 CE – 175 years before this Suratun was recited and 275 years prior to the Quran being written. The oldest surviving manuscript was found in the writings of Jacob of Serugh (circa 450 to 521 CE), a Syriac bishop. He copied an older Greek text of the fable which has since been lost. As a Catholic theologian, he wrote a homily on the legend of the Seven Sleepers which was published in Acta Sanctorum.
This fanciful tale made its way into the Quran because it became exceedingly popular in Christendom, largely as a result of its inclusion in Gregory of Tours’ Glory of the Martyrs. At the time, Christianity was enamored with miracles and martyrdom because even the most absurd of them served as signs and proofs of their god’s credibility.
According to the mythology, seven young men, all friends, were accused of being Christians during the final year of Emperor Decius’ reign in 250 CE. When they refused to bow to Rome’s gods, the young men are said to have given their possessions to the poor before retiring to a mountain cave to pray – but they fell asleep. Incredulously, Decius was so bothered by their attitude toward his gods that he tracked down the young men, found them in the cave, and ordered that its mouth be sealed. Although the Emperor died the following year, since Rome continued to demand veneration of their gods for another five decades, the boys continued to snooze.
It wasn’t until the reign of Theodosius II (circa 408-450 CE), when, following a number of theological debates over the “resurrection of the body on Judgement Day” that the lord of the estate in which the cave resided, decided to unseal it, finding the sleepers inside. When they awoke, they had thought they had slept but a day. So, they decided 368to send one of the sleepers to Ephesus to buy food, with instructions to be careful. Thereupon, he found churches with crosses and was astounded when a man tried to use some old coins dating to the reign of Decius. When a local bishop was summoned to interview the sleepers, they shared their miraculous story and then died praising god. Don’t you just love a story with a happy ending?
Suffering from long-term memory loss, there were some gaps in al-Lahi/hu/ha’s rendition of the tall tale. The number of sleepers wasn’t stated, even though the quantity was embedded in the title of the original version. To make up for this deficiency, or at least confuse the issue, Satan portrays ignorant people passing by to make idle guesses while we are reminded that Allah knows best.
However, rather than the fabled characters avoiding persecution by entering the cave outside Ephesus under Roman Emperor Decius in 250 CE and emerging during the reign of Roman Catholic Emperor Theodosius II in 450 CE, Allah doesn’t know where they were, why they were there, or how long they remained. So after playing the guessing game again, this time over the duration of their nap while claiming Allah knows best, Satan botched the answer with 300 + 9 rather than the specified 200 years that make the legend relevant.
But Allah’s little helpers have an answer for that, too. according to Muslim interpreters, the reason for the added nine years was that Islam’s lunar calendars are eleven days shy of a solar year, necessitating the nine-year addition. However, twelve 29.5-day months equates to 11.25 days shy of a year on Earth (based upon the planet’s orbit around the sun). And 300 x 11.25 / 354 = 9.53 years.
The Quranic version has a dog who the Traditions name “Qitmir.” He guarded the entrance since it was not sealed in the Islamic rendition. But, even the canine wasn’t novel to the Quran because, in the 6th-century Latin 369rendition of the Sleepers, entitled, Pilgrimage of Theodosius, there was a dog named Viricanus.
I thought it was curious that Ahmed Ali, in his translation of the Quran, wrote that the cave is the place where the Dead Sea Scrolls were found. That’s hilarious in that the Qumran scrolls prove that the Quran is fraudulent from beginning to end.
Let’s remain here in the 18th Suratun a little longer to see how Islam’s brain trust dealt with the identity of the spirit. Having finished his retelling of the story of the comatose kids, the next verse claims that the Rasuli was to recite when there was a book to read. Why would anyone do one when the other is better?
Quran 018.027 And follow, imitating and pursing, rehearsing and reciting what has been indicated, suggested, and revealed to you of the writing (book) rabbika | your lord and master. Not can change his speaking. And walan | lenient and tender, so unfit for human consumption (never) you will find from besides him a niche, receptacle, or trench which swerves and deviates (refuge).
One would have thought that the scribes who did such a poor job of assembling the random oral threads of the Quran would have settled on either “rehearsing and reciting what has been suggested and revealed” and ditched the pretense of a “book,” or insisted that there was a book and eliminated “reciting” along with the rhetorical ruse of “Say…” But evidently, while apparently literate, these scribes weren’t any brighter than the Muslims who passed these chants on to them.
If Allah can’t change his speaking, why is there a verse devoted to abrogation, replacing one statement with another? Why is there one that says that Allah renounces 370his vows? Does anyone care that the un-god cannot remember what he said from one Suratun to the next?
The parting shot, that of the master providing a niche that deviates or a trench which swerves is hard to explain apart from the idea that snakes might enjoy both.
As we move on, if “patient” was followed by “polytheist disbelievers,” presupposing that there had actually been words to convey such things, then it would be a reasonable and compassionate request. The objects are Muslims, albeit, enjoying life. So, al-Lahi/hu/ha wants to be left alone with them – not to correct them by making their lives as miserable as his own, but to abuse and waste them. And Lord knows, the eternal fires of hell require lots of bodies to burn and he wouldn’t want to disappoint his guests.
Quran 018.028 And be patient yourself with those who call their Lord in the morning and the evening desiring his face. And not pass by your eyes over them desiring adornment the life down low and not obey or permit whom we have made his heart neglectful, useless, or disobedient of our remembrance and follows his desires and is his command taking precedent or unjust.
Quran 018.029 And say, ‘The truth from your Lord so whoever wants, let him believe and whoever wants let him reject, because, indeed, we have prepared for the wrong choosing a fire, will surround and encompass them, its walls, rooftops, towers, and awnings. And if they call for relief, desiring assistance, imploring rescue, they will be aided and assisted with water like molten brass scalding, roasting, and grilling the skin of the faces. Distressful and punishing, evil and afflicting the drink and treated badly by the one doing evil, who is vicious and wicked providing this service.
Allah wants a really big show. No ordinary fires will do when it comes to entertaining his guests. No, the flames he intends to kindle in hell wrap around each body and are as large as towering buildings. But don’t even think about getting hot under the collar and complaining that the torture is too much to bear, because Mr. Nice Guy has already 371envisioned his response to those who don’t fully appreciate the torment he will be inflicting – “water like molten metal, sure to scald the skin and faces.” Is Allah akbar or what? It’s hard to imagine anything more godly than “the one doing evil being vicious and wicked, providing this service for those he is treating badly.” But since he claims to be God, who are we to suggest otherwise? Allah knows best.
By the way, the scalding liquid is “molten copper” in Quran 070.008, and Allah is using it to burn away the Earth’s atmosphere. Then in Quran 044.045, the liquid is murky oil which is said to boil in the bellies of Allah’s victims. As Speedy once announced in the 1976 Alka-Seltzer commercial based upon the jingle by Paul Margulies, “Plop, Plop, Fizz, Fizz, Oh, what a relief it is.”
Not that it actually matters since al-Lahi/hu/ha was Satan, not God, and since his Quran was the worst un-book ever recited, but what is the required level of belief and, other than terrorizing, killing, stealing, lying, and enslaving, while prostrating and paying, what is the right thing to do?
Quran 018.030 Lo, those who believed and did the right, lo, we not will let it go waste reward who good doing.
It has been the Devil’s Bargain from the beginning. Muslims who forfeit their freedoms, lives, and wealth robbing others of their freedom, lives, and property by enslaving, slaying, and stealing, are offered a second chance to enjoy a drunken, bisexual, pedophilic orgy in a demonic garden – all bones reattached courtesy of al-Lahu/hi/ha. It is all spelled out so cleverly and clearly…
Quran 018.031 Those for them Janatu | the dark, possessed, and insane Demonic Gardens abide and remain, pursues the flow from below them al-anharu | the repulsive streams of chiding and browbeating. And they will make and acquire ornaments, therein from asawira | overpowering bracelets or assaulting suratun dhahabin | removed, gone, and taken away, now obsolete (gold), and will be clothed thiyaban | to return, repaid with rewarding garments 372khud’ran | forbidden and premature death becoming green of sundusin | silk, gleaming and threatening, menacing like lightning (brocade) reclining therein on couches, thrones, or camels. Easy life and convenient comforts the return and repayment (reward) and good and pleasing the utility (resting place).
Part of the crazymaking of the Quran is that it contains a medley of words whose connotations do not fit the context. And since those who question the Quran are decapitated by Muslims, there is scant incentive to share the actual definitions of the words which are altered to keep Allah from exposing himself even more overtly as Satan. For example, no Islamic translator would dare tell Muslims that the Jiim-Nun-Nun root of Janatu is the same word rendered elsewhere in the Quran as “demons and devils.” It means “veiled and concealed, dark and possessed, insane madness and confusion,” and addresses “spiritual beings who conceal themselves as devils and demons.” Since Jinn is the Persian word for Serpentine Devil, it is commonly transliterated in the Quran as “Jinn” or “jinn,” as it is in this same Suratun (Quran 018.050). Oops.
It is rendered as “jinn,” speaking of demons and devils, 34 times in the Quran, as “mad or madness” in the sense of demon-possessed and insane, on 12 occasions, as “concealed or covered” six times, and as “snake” twice. On all other occasions, Jiim-Nun-Nun is “translated” as “Garden, Gardens, or Paradise.” So, in striving to be transparent and correct, I’ve incorporated the most common renderings into these translations.
While not as sinister, a more accurate portrayal of the repeated oddity of the “rivers undermining” the demonic hideout, would be: “pursues the flow from below them the repulsive streams of chiding and browbeating.” That does not sound particularly appealing.
And since the notion of bodily resurrection is religious folly, and since it would be impossible to exist for a prolonged period of time as a physical entity, or exist even 373for a moment apart from the material realm, the rest of al-Lahi/hu/ha’s portrayal isn’t possible, even supposing someone could actually figure out what any of this means: “And they will make and acquire ornaments, therein from asawira | overpowering bracelets or assaulting Suratun, dhahabin | removed, gone, and taken away, now obsolete, and will be clothed thiyaban | to return, repaid with rewarding garments, khud’ran | forbidden and of premature death becoming green, sundusin | silk, gleaming and threatening, menacing like lightning, reclining therein on couches, thrones, or camels.” It would appear that the Quran, with its overpowering Suratun has performed as required and it is now being taken away as obsolete. This is a reward, a payment in kind, for causing premature death through morally forbidden acts, such that the threatening and menacing are reclining on their camels. And this leads to “Easy life and convenient comforts the return and repayment (reward) and good and pleasing the utility (resting place).”
Here's to hoping that the Lord of Demons answers the question on the spirit soon so that we can leave hell and go on about our lives.
Quran 018.032 And strike and propound, setting forth to them standing erect, mutilated or castrated (the example) of feet (two men). We made for one of them dark and veiled, possessed and insane, demonic gardens of grapes, and we surrounded them with sifting drizzle and snow (date-palms). And we made between them sowing of seeds cast to the ground (crops).
Clearly, Allah needed to get out more, stretch his scales and see the world. There is more to life than this. But that wasn’t the point, because this is another of the Lord’s parables, so there is sure to be a moral lesson forthcoming. Maybe we’ll find the spirit shyly hidden in the darkness behind a veil.
Quran 018.033 Each the dark and veiled demonic gardens gave its swallowing and chewing subsistence for tasting and not did cruel lord or oppressive tyrant of it a desired thing, matter, or wanted affair. And we cut and divided, breaking open wickedly at down within them a repulsive stream to chide and browbeat.
374Are you enjoying the story and following along so far? We have two mutilated feet, and a matching pair of demonic gardens, some drizzle, perhaps snow, even possibly date palms around some grapes, with seeds of some sort scattered. As a result, there was swallowing and chewing in both devilish hell holes, but no cruel tyrants or oppressive lords, no matter what affairs they may have desired. Then, at dawn, it was wickedly torn asunder, with “we” opening a means to repulsively chide.
Then at this point, one of the fellas gets all uppity and starts acting like Allah and Muhammad…
Quran 018.034 And was lahu | for him fruit, so to his friend, associate, or companion while he was converting, contending with, or whitening and purifying him, ‘I am surpassing than you wealth and mighty and power to go forth for business and war (men).’
Quran 018.035 And he entered his demonic garden while he as a tyrant and cruel lord to himself. He said, ‘Not I think that will remain permanently this remain ever.
I suppose that the moral of the story is that only one scoundrel at a time can play god…
Quran 018.036 And not I think the hour will occur [literally: the let run free and lost rise and stand still]. And if I am sent back, rejecting and refusing, to my Rabbi, I will surely find better than this a return.’
Quran 018.037 Said to him his friend and companion while he was returning and recoiling, converting and purifying him, ‘Do you kafar | conceal as reconciled (disbelieve) in one who measured and proportioned you from turabin | destitute and impoverished dust, well matched and miserable, then from nutfah | sexual discharge, then arranged uniform and rajulan | feet (a man)?’
Is this a sick joke or trick question? I have no argument with the realization that all animals are comprised of organic elements in an exceedingly complex design and then become conscious with the addition of a soul, but that isn’t what is conveyed here. This particular man would 375have been conceived by his parents, not from dust and without a rabbi. Nutfah, if semen, is a small part of the process and not only comes first but requires an egg to fertilize and a womb to grow, neither of which were mentioned and none of which involve the Divine. Is the Snake now auditioning as a sex therapist in addition to his day job as a terrorist and tormentor? We know that rajulan means “feet,” not only because it is defined as such in Arabic dictionaries, but also because it is derived from the Hebrew regel with the same meaning.
There are an infinite number of reasons to disassociate Allah from Yahowah, and this is one of them…
Quran 018.038 But for me he al-Lahu my Rabbi and not I associate any friends, sharing, associates, or partners, with my lord one.
In this regard, Allah and Yahowah are opposites. And since Hell will be well attended and very tightly packed with Allah’s slaves, he is going to be highly agitated.
And since the Adversary’s aversion to people and sharing is well known, why did he bother with this parable of the demonic garden and all of this incomprehensible dialog?
Quran 018.039 And why not when you entered your dark and demonic garden say, ‘What will al-Lahu, no power or prevailing but with il-Lahi if you see me lesser than your wealth and begetting?
Quran 018.040 It may be my Rabbi that will give me better than your demons and devils, insanity and madness, (garden), and will send me messenger upon it for thinking (a calamity) from the sky then it will be overwhelmingly severe, a tormenting calamity, and a laborious punishment slippery and disgusting. Quran 018.041 Or will become its water depressed and sunken, so never you will be able it to find.’
We are to believe that there will be a messenger upon it for thinking, which Muslims consider a calamity. And it will come from the sky which will be overwhelmingly 376severe and tormenting, a slippery and disgusting punishment. Either that, or water becomes depressed and the oceans run away and hide.
Quran 018.042 And were guarding and encompassing, totally surrounding his fruits so he turned hearts inside out (twisting turmoil) his withheld and withdrawn (hands) over what he spent on it while it vacated, ruined, and collapsed on its trellises. And he said, ‘O, I wish not had I associated companions, partners, participants, or sharing with my Rabbi any.’
Who would have thought that a few friends and some sharing could lead to guarding fruits, turning hearts inside out, withholding what was spent, and vacated trellises? But, lo, verily al-Lahu/hi//ha not like the associations.
Quran 018.043 And not was lahu | for him a smote or strike (group) help him from other than al-Lahi and not was assisted or protected. Quran 018.044 There the near turn or allies (protection) from il-Lahi the true, he best return and reward and best the punishment, penalty, retaliation, heels, or end.
And therein was the parable of the demonic garden and satanic deity – the best of the punishers and penalizers. And joy to the strikers and standers in the life down low, even the waterers and minglers, because the spirit is about to blow in so we can bow out…
Quran 018.045 And to strike and put forth to them the stand erect (example and proverb) the life the down low (world) like water which we send down for the sky then mingles with it grows and produces (vegetation) the ground then becomes crushed and broken (dry stalks) it scattered al-riyahu | the spiritual winds and al-Lahu over every matter and affair measured and decreed, able and honored.
Apparently, al-Lahi/ha/hu is into irrigation, germination, mingling, and crushing, then scattering. But, I don’t suppose this is the answer regarding the identity of the spirit. That notwithstanding, why were Muslims ordered to plunder their extended family followed by pillaging the Jews if property and possessions were bad? 377The notion that children are a meaningless adornment, akin to a nicely detailed deck, is, of course, understandable for Satan’s perspective since he hates people.
Quran 018.046 The wealth, possessions, and property, and building and framing (children) adornment, like trimmed decking, the life the down low (world), but the remaining right better near your Lord and Master, reward and possessed of good option of hope.
And why must the Islamic un-god be so damn destructive? What does he have against the planet? What did it do to him that was so horrible he wants to level it?
Quran 018.047 And day we will cause to go travel and move the mountains and you will see the earth either leave or turn into a leveled plain, and we collect and gather them together, and not we will perfidious, treacherous, or leave behind from them any.
Okay, I get it. For there to be a reptilian overlord, there must be a flat earth. These myths, along with the plague of chemtrails, are conspiratorial favorites.
Quran 018.048 And they will be presented before your Lord and Master rows. Certainly you have come to us as we measured you the return for family (first) time. Nay, you claimed that not we made for you a promised threat (appointment).
Allah is such a charming storyteller and has such a vivid imagination.
Quran 018.049 And be placed the writing (book) and you will see the disobedient criminals pitiful and fearful, even terrorized in the twilight glow in awe of what in it. And they will say, ‘O, woe to us. What for this the writing (book) not perfidious, treacherous, neglectful to leave out a little subjection or humiliation and not a greatly grievous of arrogance except has calculated and enumerated it.’ And they will find what they did presented. And not deals a cruel lord or subjugating tyrant your lord one.
So, when did the parable of the crushed and meaningless children and moving mountains for a flat earth end and the parade to hell begin? Why is there a grievously 378terrorizing book of every subjugation and humiliation and no Quran? And how can the best of the punishers not be a cruel lord?
With those questions lingering, we are about to revisit one of Satan’s favorite stories – his revisionist version of what occurred in Eden long ago. In fact, the Adversary was so eager to share it, he dispensed with the realization rational orators and intelligent communicators provide thoughtful transitions between subjects. But it’s far worse than that for Allah this time. What follows is one of the most incriminating revelations in a long list of Quranic blunders.
Allah’s problems begin with the use of malaik, which is from the Hebrew, mal’ak, meaning “spiritual messenger and heavenly implement.” As a qarowb | cherub overseeing the Gan ‘Eden, the un-god of Islam was once counted among them. Mal’ak are part of the tsaba’ | large contingent of spiritual envoys serving Yahowah and His interests – including protecting members of His Covenant Family. They are the reason I remain out in the open and yet unharmed while writing and promoting God Damn Religion under my real name. Their protective role is explained in Dowd’s magnificent 91st Mizmowr | Psalm (presented in the Dabarym ~ Words, volume one of An Introduction to God, chapter three, Qara’ | Calling ~ Why You, Why Me). Without them, I would not have survived to write the 34 volumes of Yada Yahowah (free at YadaYah.com).
While some mal’ak rebelled with ha Satan, they are few and far between compared to those who remain responsive to Yahowah. Nonetheless, Allah claims throughout the Quran that the malaikati | angels not only follow his commands, but that they are ruthless killers, ever ready to overpower, torture, and annihilate humans. And now, Allah is admitting that not only is Iblis | the Devil (derived from a crude transliteration of the Greek Diablos 379| Devil, and thus Satan) counted among his malaikati | angels, they are Jinn | Demons and Devils. Therefore, Allah’s angels are demons and he is the Devil.
This realization becomes especially incriminating because there is an entire Suratun devoted to these Jinn | Demons and Devils. Within it, they endorse the Quran and admit that it came from their Lord. So, when the two pronouncements are juxtaposed, the only rational conclusion that can be drawn is that the Lord of the Quran, the voice of Islam, is Satan.
Recognizing all of this, the following statement is insane. There is no justification for al-malaikati to “prostrate to man.” This is true when they are properly cast as mal’ak or when they are designated as demons. Not only is prostration a religious act of submission in humiliation, something which Yahowah vehemently opposes, it was designated as a “command” to be “obeyed,” both of which are counter to God’s nature. The absurdity of this demand is further illustrated by the fact that in Islam, mankind must submit to the Lord through humiliating prostrations to Allah. This problem is exacerbated by Allah’s exceedingly demeaning references to mankind in what follows.
Therefore, the only way any of this makes sense is when we see it from the Cherub’s perspective who was transformed into a Snake. While guarding ‘Eden, it is apparent that he was annoyed by all of the attention Yahowah paid ‘Adam and became jealous. This is why he abandoned his post and misappropriated Yahowah’s testimony, as he has done throughout the Quran, to mislead humankind. But when Yahowah reduced him to a lowly serpent for this crime, the former Cherub, now Snake, decided he would retaliate against Yahowah by massacring His children. The Quran is the result. And in it, Satan must make it appear as if he isn’t actually the Adversary, but is, instead, God, for his sinister plot to prevail. And that is why Allah is depicted as the Lord of Iblis, Demons, and Devils.
380Quran 018.050 And when we said to al-malaikati | the spiritual messengers (angels), ‘Prostrate to Adam.’ So they prostrated except Ib’lisa | the Devil. (He) was of the Jinn | Demons and Devils, the insane and confused. And he rebelled, committing disobedience against the command his rabbi | lord.
‘Will you then take him and his insignificant kind resembling a grub or an ant (offspring) as friends and protectors from other than me while they are to you lowly submissives, tormenting and punishing, a wretched adversary as enemies and transgressors for the cruel lords badalan | changing and altering, substituting and exchanging, even replacing?’
Allah despises humanity. He is calling us “grubs and ants, lowly submissives, and wretched adversaries.” So this isn’t about honoring man, the creature that has been made to prostrate to himself to survive, but about denouncing humanity while “changing roles, altering identities, substituting characters, and replacing” his Adversary designation as ha Satan with Lord and then God.
There is only one situation in which humankind is a lowly submissive to the Devil, and that is in Islam. There is only one situation in which men and women are formidable adversaries of Satan, and that is in the realization that we have the potential to receive God’s blessings and endure with Him, thereby curtailing Satan’s ambitions. As a result, Allah / Satan’s time in She’owl begins the moment Yisra’el’s relationship with Yahowah is reconciled.
This is the ultimate narcissist projecting his faults on humankind such that by slathering them elsewhere, the characters and characterizations are confused. It is a smokescreen. Satan / Allah is guilty of doing everything he is falsely attributing to humankind.
So, now that this tactic has been deployed, it’s time for Allah to gloat at man’s expense…
Quran 018.051 ‘Not I made them witnesses the measuring and proportioning (creation) the high and lofty (heavens) and the 381ground and not the measuring and proportioning themselves and not I am the one to take into account strays and deviators.’
The reason that Allah claims throughout the Quran that he is the creator, while unable to provide any indication that the claim is true, is because he wants to play God. And it’s Satan who strayed away from God and who deviated from his assigned mission, which was to protect humanity, not annihilate us.
This falls under the designation of incomprehensible because we do not know who is talking to whom, about what, where, when, and why...
Quran 018.052 And day he will say, Call my associates and partners with whom I share, those who you asserted, then they will seek to invoke them but not they will make a hole or tear a thing (respond) to them. And we will make between them deadly destruction (barrier). Quran 018.053 And will see the cut off and criminal the fire and they certain that they are to fall down in it. And not they will find from it a way of escape or to turn away.
Other than Satan, who else would be this fixated on burning people alive and tormenting them with no means of escape?
So now, after demonstrating that he is Satan and not God, Allah chooses the wrong verbs and nouns to convey his Quranic deceptions.
Quran 018.054 And certainly we have turned away (explained) in this al-Qur’ani | the recital for lifted up (mankind) of every standing erect (example), but is the sociable and conversational, the friendly and amicable (the man) surpassing (most) wishes and wants (things) twisted and contentious, disputing and arguing.
It's true that the Quran is repulsive, but it isn’t for the raised or standing, but for the submissive and prostrating. And as an antisocial recluse, it’s obvious that Allah is opposed to anyone who is sociable, friendly, or amicable. His desires are all that matter never man’s. And he, as 382Satan, is the most twisted and contentious of creation. So Allah has returned to narcissistic projecting.
Other than perhaps the realization that Allah is Satan and that the Quran has no credibility…
Quran 018.055 And nothing prevents the uplifted that they believe when has come to them the guidance and they ask forgiveness their lord except that comes to them way the family, people, or former people or comes to them the accepted and agreed (previous) punishment.
Allah has a different set of exceptions. They include the “way the family or former people” and “the accepted and agreed (previous) punishment.” But how can that be since Islam is the religion of Muhammad’s ancestors and Allah claims to have inspired the Towrah and Gospels of the former people? And, there was no “previously accepted and agreed punishment.” But I suppose expecting Allah to be sensible is a fool’s folly.
As a result, Allah has suffered from the same credibility problem his entire 6,000-year life. He remains a source of ridicule.
Quran 018.056 And not we send the sent except bearers glad tidings and warners. And dispute those who are reconciled with falsehood to slip as invalid losers, refuting thereby the suitable requirements. And they take my signs (verses) and what they are warned ridicule, disgracefully deriding and laughing.
Quran 018.057 And who more cruel and oppressive than who is reminded of the signs (verses) his rabbi | lord but takes place, presenting (turns away) from them and forsakes and forgets what preceded feet (have sent forth) his hands?
Lo, verily, we, we have made over their hearts coverings and guards lest they learn and understand it and in their ears a heavy load (deafness). And if you call them to the guidance, then never they will be guided then ever.
Since almost everyone who heard this nonsense rejected Allah’s recitals for thousands of valid reasons, the 383un-god was afraid that reason would prevail and that he’d lose control over his deadly zombies. So, to explain away the propensity of men and women to mock his recitals, Allah said that there was a covering over their hearts and a load in their ears. He didn’t have to concern himself with their eyes or minds since there was nothing to read and Muslims weren’t thinking.
Should Allah’s answer regarding the identity of the spirit not be forthcoming, we will be forgoing. That is if we can look away from the train wreck that is the Suratun to be forgotten.
Quran 018.058 And your Lord protecting, covering over, and hiding, possessor al-Rahman | the favors and pardons. If he were to seize them for what they acquired and earned, surely he would have accelerated in hastiness for them the punishment. But for them a promised threat (punishment), never they will find for other than it an escape.
Here we find Islam’s Lord demonstrating his mercy by his promise to punish. And that hypocrisy is followed by Allah’s history as a destructive terrorist and annihilator.
Quran 018.059 And these the towns, cities, and civilizations we destroyed them when they were oppressive and we made for their death and destruction, wasting and spoiling them, a promised threat.
That was particularly demonic and nasty, so to defuse the obvious Satanic overtures, Satan returns to his favorite ploy – misappropriating Yahowah’s testimony – albeit without an intelligent transition.
Quran 018.060 And when said Musa to his boy, ‘Not I will cease until I reach the junction the two seas or I advance to suppression (continue a long period).
Moseh had a son, one who accompanied him in his return to Mitsraym to liberate the Children of Yisra’el, but his name was not “boy.” This conversation never occurred, 384as it is nonsensical. Moreover, it gets worse, as dumb becomes dumber…
Quran 018.061 But when they reached the junction between them they forgot their flying and prowling around (fish) and it took its way into the slit (sea) going freely, funning with the flow in an optical illusion or mirage (slipping away).
Quran 018.062 Then when they had passed beyond he said to his boy, ‘Give us our morning (meal). Lo, verily, we have met and encountered, experiencing (suffered) in our scribing, sweeping, and journeying, this fixed, stone alters, hard labor (fatigue).”
Quran 018.063 He said, ‘Did you see when we retired to the rock?’ Then, lo, I, I forgot the flying and prowling around (fish). And not made me forget it except ha-Shayatin | the Adversary, Satan, that I remembered it. And it took its way into the sea amazingly.
Quran 018.064 He said, ‘That what we were seeking.’ So, they returned on their narration and recital (footprints), imparting and recounting the narrative (retracing). Quran 018.065 Then they found a slave from our slaves whom we had given Rahman | favor from us and we had taught him from us a knowledge.
Quran 018.066 Said to him, ‘Musa, may I follow you on that you teach me of what you have been taught to follow?’ Quran 018.067 He said, ‘Lo, verily, you never will be able with me patience.
Quran 018.068 And how can you have patience for what not you guard and protect (encompass) of it knowledge?’ Quran 018.069 He said, ‘You will find me if al-Lahu wills patient and not I will disobey your command.’
Quran 018.070 He said, ‘Then if you follow me not ask me about anything until I something new (present) to you of a remembrance.’
Quran 018.071 So they set out divorced until when they had embarked on the sculpture (ship) he pierced and perforated it. He said, “have you bored a hole in it to drown its possessing people? Lo, you have done a thing command (grave).’
Quran 018.072 He said, Did not I say, ‘Lo, you never will be able with me patience?’ Quran 018.073 He said, ‘Not take (blame) 385me for what I forgot and not follow closely covering the foolishness (be hard) me in my command difficulty.’
Quran 018.074 Then they divorced, repudiated (set out) until when they met a boy excited with lust then he killed him. He said, ‘Have you killed a soul pure for other than a soul. Lo, verily, you have done a wanted thing disliked, unacquainted, and disapproved.’
Quran 018.075 He said, Did not I say to you that you never will be able with me patience?’ Quran 018.076 He said, ‘If I ask you about wanting anything after it then not keep me as a companion. Verily, you have reached from me an excuse.’
Quran 018.077 So they divorced until when they came possessors an entertaining guest (town). They ate, tasting and swallowing its possessed people and owners, but the disapproved and were noncompliant, resisting guests. Then they found in it a wall wanting to be pierced (tumble down), so he stood up and still (set it straight). He said, ‘If you wanted, surely you have taken for it a payment.’
Quran 018.078 He said, ‘This separating divide between me and between you. I will be high and exalted (inform) you of family (interpretation) what not you were able on it patience.’ Quran 018.079 As for the hewn sculpture (ship), it was to be quiet (poor people) doing in the sea so I seek that I damage it, unserviceable, was after them a king who seized every hewn sculpture (ship), taken without permission.
Quran 018.080 And as for the lustful and excited boy, were his father (parents) believers and we feared that he would follow closely and be mischievous reaching them (overcome) by exceeding the limits and concealing reconciliation (disbelief), Quran 018.081 so we wanted that would change, altering, substituting, and replacing for them their Lord a better than him, increased and augmented, purer, and nearer Rahman.
Quran 018.082 And as for the wall, it was for those excited with lust and stirred up, orphan in town, lonely and jaded before puberty in the city. And was under it a treasure buried for them. Ans was their father right. So sought your Lord that they reach their being tightly bound and severely violent (maturity) and bring forth their treasure, a favor forgiven from your Lord. And not I did it on my 386command. That return family (interpretation) what not you were able on it patience.’
And with the treasure under the wall for the lustful lad, jaded before puberty, and the seeking of the lord for them to be tightly bound and exceptionally violent, the family was reunited thanks to our patience. And while the man is dead, the ship was sunk, the people drowned, and the companions divorced several times, we have reached the point of Astronaut Alexander taking flight on ISS al-Lahi/hu/ha to the sun. Identifying the nature of the spirit was evidently more challenging than visiting extraterrestrials and counting sleepers.
What is certain, however, is that left to their own devices, and without Jewish and Hanif inspiration, Muhammad and Allah didn’t fare very well. The 18th Suratun is the Quran’s most foolish.
